Don Revie: Home and away

More than two decades after his death, Don Revie remains a deeply divisive figure in English football. On one side of the argument are, by and large, those whose loyalty remains to Leeds United, on the other those from outside Leeds who talk with disdain about the nastiness of his team. And of the corruption and venality for which Revie has since become renowned.

What both his supporters and critics do agree on, however, is that what he built at Elland Road was a band of brothers so committed to each other that if you kicked one, you incurred the wrath of them all. They were family, and much of the fostering of that spirit was down to Don's wife Elsie. Remembering how lonely it could feel as the wife of a recently transferred footballer who was offered little help in adapting to her new surroundings, Elsie endeavoured to try and create a more welcoming environment. Peter Lorimer recalls: "Elsie was the one behind sending out flowers to the players' wives on their birthday or when someone was ill. They worked as a real team and I always thought of Elsie as more than a wife to Don. It is true what they say about every successful man needing a strong woman behind him as that is exactly what Don had in Elsie."

It was not just in helping the players' families settle quickly at Elland Road where Elsie played a huge part in her husband's success but, also, in the Revie family home. The life of a football manager is inevitably a demanding one with the pressure often becoming all-consuming. Opportunities to switch off are few, and without the love and support of a close family, the job can swallow up the most level-headed of managers. Even the most routine of family tasks can see thoughts turn to what team should play on Saturday or when a star player is going to be back from injury.

Revie's daughter Kim recalls: "I only realised it later in life but my mum did so much for dad. She kept the family going seamlessly and was the one who helped with homework and things like that. Mum had a great understanding of the pressures that came with dad's job and, subtly, she would make sure we didn't drive dad crazy as kids. This was particularly the case on a matchday. She also made sure dad was allowed to have a lie-in on a Sunday, the one day off he had in the week.

"It was a real partnership and dad could not have been as successful without her. I think it helped that mum was quite out-going and sociable. When you are married to someone famous, there is a danger of being lost in their slipstream but that was never the case with mum. She was never happier than when chatting away to whoever, whereas dad was much quieter."

Within a few months of Revie being appointed manager at Elland Road in 1961, there was little doubt who was in charge. The moniker "gaffer" became wholly appropriate throughout his 13 subsequent years in the hot seat.

Few decisions, if any, were made without his say-so and stories of the power he wielded across the club and the city are legendary. Whether it be knowing exactly what his players were doing at night, thanks to a team of spies keeping an eye on the pubs and clubs of Leeds, or conducting contract negotiations, Revie was in charge and the man everyone went to for a decision.

Within the family, however, it was a different story. The couple's son Duncan recalls: "Mum was very much a Scottish matriarch figure. She was a very, very strong character. I would not necessarily say she was the boss of the house as dad gave as good as he got. But she could insist on getting her own way.

"One such time came when I was 15 and at Leeds Grammar School. Leeds United were top of the league and I was basking in being Don Revie's son, and all the attention that came with it. It meant my schoolwork was suffering. Mum said to my dad one night, 'Don, this is not right – we have to send him away to boarding school'. Dad pointed out they couldn't really afford to because it was expensive but mum insisted and got her way. I ended up going to a school in Derbyshire called Repton.

"I will always remember dad dropping me off there for the first time and crying. I was crying as well, but mum just shouted, 'Get in the car, Don, it will do him the world of good'. And you know what? She was right, as being away from Leeds meant I retrieved my academic career and eventually went on to Cambridge University, where I qualified as a lawyer."

Sending their son away to boarding school to keep his mind on studying rather than events at Elland Road may have been a necessity, but there is no doubting the all-consuming love the couple had for football.

Elsie's family had been steeped in football from an early age so she was a keen student of the game, an interest that was only strengthened when she met her future husband. Later, at Leeds, she was so keen on debating the whys and wherefores of a game that many believed, with tongue firmly placed in cheek, her influence stretched beyond supporting the manager.

Peter Lorimer says: "Elsie knew her football and a few of us at Leeds used to think she picked the team some weeks." That may have been stretching things a tad but, as Duncan recalls, his mother certainly didn't hold back when discussing football matters with her husband. "Football was something they would debate furiously," he says. "Having grown up in a football environment and with two of her grandads' brothers having played for Scotland, she was very knowledgeable. Mum and dad would have some great arguments on a Saturday night about the game they had watched in the afternoon. They could get quite heated, and if I had to pick a winner I would say they finished as score draws.

"All sorts of things would be discussed – who should be tracking back, who should be doing more in possession and whether someone should be kicking with their other foot. The best thing is they were arguing about all this stuff when Leeds were winning everything. I dread to think what Saturday nights would have been like if Leeds had been losing every week."

Revie's public persona may have been similar to that of his Leeds team, dour with little warmth. He may also, again like the players who looked up so adoringly to him, be forever damned as one of the bad guys of English football. But to those who shared his life, he was a very different character.

Daughter Kim recalls: "My brother and I were really lucky. I know everyone loves their parents but we enjoyed spending time with them so much that, even in our 20s as others were trying to get away from their parents and strike out on their own, we loved nothing better than spending time with them both. We were very fortunate and I always tell people who ask what dad was like the same thing. He was a great football manager, but an even better dad."

Next week: The moment Revie knew his reign as England manager would not be successful.

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YP MAG 16/10/10